Let's welcome author S. B. Alexander to my humble literary abode. Thank you so much for agreeing to this beautiful guest post on your tour for DARE TO KISS. It is a truly unique feeling to hear about a person's life in such deep, touching way.
How love changed my life.
Love is a word that makes you smile, makes you cry, makes you feel, makes you sad, makes you think about a person, a place, and even a thing.
As a kid, I lived in world where love didn’t exist, a world where the norm was hopping from foster to foster home because my dad couldn’t take care of me after my mom died. So I never knew the meaning of what it meant to love a person. Honestly, I think hate was more powerful at that time in my life. No one told me they loved me, and I wasn’t in a foster home long enough to get attached to anyone. So as a kid I closed myself off and hid in a corner.
As I grew into an adult and continued my journey in life, I worried that the coldness inside me would never go away. How could I get rid of the bitterness and open up my mind enough to heal or let anyone in? Or even allow myself to understand what it meant to love another person. I saw my friends around me, and their loving relationships with their parents, siblings, husbands, friends and boyfriends. It saddened me to witness others happiness. Maybe my destiny wasn’t to experience love. Still, did I need love to be happy?
Then I had my first crush as a teenager. Butterflies found a home in my stomach when I laid eyes on a boy who lived in my neighborhood. What did it mean? Did butterflies equal love? Maybe I thought. I was certainly happy and giddy over the feelings I had for him. But after he broke my heart, I realized that even though things didn’t work out between us, I found hope that I was capable of feeling more than just hatred. But how would I feel or react if someone said they loved me?
I was careful with my heart as I continued to date. If loving someone ended with a broken heart, I didn’t want any part of it. Still, I had to put myself out there. I had to find out what it meant to really love and be loved.
Someone had told me once that love is a remedy for those that are broken inside.
After everything I experienced as a child I was skeptical. But when a lady whom I met while I was in the military took me in as though I was her daughter, I began to understand the meaning behind what that person had told me. She poured her heart and soul into showing me what life could be like when someone loves you unconditionally. She gave me her love. It was weird at first to hear a woman I’d known for only a few months tell me she loved me like I was her daughter.
From her friendship, her love, her time, her trust, she helped me unravel the confusion of my childhood. I realized I didn’t love me, or the person inside me. More importantly, she taught me how to love myself before I love someone else. Our time together was inspirational, cathartic and overwhelming, and to this day she’s still a guiding light in my life.
I thank God everyday for the path I took. Love does hurt. Love does challenge you. But most of all Love does heal. Without love in my life, I may not be where I am today.
DARE TO KISS
S. B. ALEXANDER
Page Count: 340
New Adult Fiction, Romance
September 30, 2014
Besides her family, Lacey Robinson’s only other love is baseball. She’s on top of the world when Arizona State University approaches her to discuss a scholarship. To be the first girl ever to grace a college boys’ team is beyond what she has ever dreamed.
Her fastball is impeccable, her curveball equally as good, and her slider annihilates anyone who dares to step in the batter’s box. But fate has its own way of throwing curveballs. When she looses her mother and sister to a home invasion, baseball and her dreams die with them. Tragedy has a way of seeping deep into her psyche, causing nightmares, panic attacks and blackouts.
Diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, her psychiatrist recommends a change of scenery and picking up the things that she loved to do, and for Lacey that is baseball.
After a move clear across the country, only two things matter to Lacey—overcome her PTSD and make Kensington High’s baseball team. But trying out for the team comes with obstacles—the captain, Aaron Seever, doesn’t want a girl on the team.
Her life is further complicated when she meets Kade Maxwell, a tall, sexy and drool-worthy bad boy who has a magical touch that awakens her feminine side and a kiss that slowly erases her nightmares.
But getting involved with him may be dangerous when Kade’s archenemy returns to town to settle a vendetta.
To complicate matters, her PTSD has taken a turn for the worse. She has to find a way to heal otherwise she may not have a chance at anything in life, especially love.